Natural Hair --- 99% Rules

Hello Naturals, Transitioning Naturals, and the curious!

I "big chopped" over a year ago -- July 2010 after transitioning for a year and a half. For the past year, I have learned soooo much. The greatest lesson has been learning how to "accept" my natural hair. It has enabled me to enter into the "Lazy Natural" zone, where my hair is really an "afterthought". Just thought I'd share what has gotten me to this point.

The Big Chop - July 2010

First --- let's start with the Basics!

As you probably already know or will soon figure out that….

• 99% of Natural Hair Transitioning is a transition of “mindset”, a deprogramming, of all the things you’ve learned about your hair and even your idea of what makes Hair Styles “Cute”

• 99% of the “freedom” you will experience with Natural Hair is TO NOT FIGHT AGAINST IT; but learn how to find styles that complement your hair type..

With that said – over the course of a year – I have THREE MAJOR things that I have learned NOT to FIGHT against and it has made my life SO MUCH easier –– to the point where I feel like my natural hair care regimen is actually “on par” to my relaxed hair regimen, in terms of time spent.

Three things I‘ve learned NOT TO FIGHT:

1.       Shrinkage: Length was probably the easiest for me to let go as I’ve always had short hair (my relaxed hair was constantly breaking). My hair ranges from shoulder to collar bone length when stretched, but still shrinks to my ear (top) and at my neckline (back). My thought is this -- As long as I keep my hair healthy,  eventually I will get to my desired styling length (Jawbone length - shrunken) I also keep in mind – that there are advantages and disadvantages of every length. Some things that I enjoy now at this length, I won’t enjoy at my desired length and vice versa. So, I’m content with enjoying the advantages of my current length and patiently waiting on my desired length. Who knows – I may actually get there and think that length sucks! LOL!! 

2.       Big Hair: It never fails—At the end of the day, My hair almost NEVER looks EXACTLY like it did when I styled it that morning. I think my hair fits the definition of “high porosity” – it absorbs moisture from the atmosphere and swells by the end of the day. Even if I stay inside most of the day – it still swells. I no longer get upset about it --- If I want my hair to not look as big at the end of the day…I make smaller twists for my twist-out, so when it swells it’s not as big as it would have been with larger twists. However, the MAIN reason I am at a place where I don’t worry about BIG hair is due to the third thing I’ve learned to not fight….you ready for this one….LOL!

3.       The “Nappy” Look: LOL!!! Soooooooo, the natural hair nazi’s may want to throw me in the lake of fire for this statement but --- but I’m “big girl” enough to admit that the deeply ingrained contempt for the “nappy look” has kept me IN BONDAGE!! **rolling my neck*** “YEP – I SAID IT….SO SHOOT ME”!!! I have to admit that there were times when I looked at myself in the mirror and caught a glimpse of “Miss Celie”(color purple). Hey – I’m just keeping it real…LOL!! At the beginning -- I hated my twist-outs after 2 days… I was re-twisting my hair, shuffling through youtube videos, ALL the CurlyNikki.com archives, I was searching the aisles every single day for new products to keep my hair looking defined…It was SOOOOOOOO TIRING!!! Today – I actually like my hair better when it looks “older”.

Now, I wish I had a magic potion that I could point to that flipped the switch for me; but the truth of the matter is that the principle of “renewing the mind” is a process.  Those bad thoughts and feelings have to be canceled with affirmations! To be honest, whenever I felt uncomfortable with my look – I faked confidence until I actually became confident. I would dress up a little more, put a little more make-up on, remind myself that I am already beautiful since beauty is a state of “being”, then I would walk out the door like I was on the runway! I know it sounds cheesy but it really did work! I noticed I received more compliments on these days than any other… and most of those people were shocked to learn that I thought I was having a “bad hair day”..LOL!

Which brings me to my final lesson learned above all lessons….99% of my BEST Hairstyles were not the ones that had more definition, stretched, or less nappy – but were actually the ones where I displayed the MOST Confidence…

Just a little food for thought! Good Luck to you on your own journey & remember to be DRAG Confidence with you… even if you have to fake it for a little while…


Yours truly,
-Bee Franklin